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    Where's God in the Muck?

    Here I am again getting disgusted by all the games and junk one has to wade through to be a part of today’s marketplace of the internet. So much of it (90%) is absolute crap. It’s a place where little people like to wade in and throw mudballs rather than add anything constructive to the mix. I don’t want to become small in my thinking but lately I can avoid feeling small for about the length of time I can hold my breath. I’ve been leaving my time of writing feeling discouraged, disgusted and ineffective like there’s a black cloud descending as soon as I turn on the computer.

    How does one wade into the muck and bring something fresh without walking away covered in muck? All this silliness, besides being a huge time-suck, kills my desire and ability to write. After just a few minutes of breathing those toxins I have nothing of worth to say nor do I believe anyone will pay attention even if I put something of worth into the mix. 

    Lord I want to be a light in the darkness for You but the overall jaded perspective just breaks my heart. I know it breaks Yours too.

    I keep reminding myself I write for an audience of One. But there’s so much noise and just flat-out ugliness.

    I've been thinking of Moses—a lot. He had some amazing experiences with God on the mountaintop. But I’m sure the lion’s share of his energy on normal days, on those Mondays when he really would rather stay in bed than face all the issues clamoring for his attention, was spent navigating the ugliness of tribal bickering and mundane tasks that made him wonder, “Am I accomplishing anything here? Where’s that power I was plugged into on the mountaintop? How can such an amazing calling lead through ordinary frustrations? 

    I watched someone work on a tapestry once. It was rather boring, just pull back and forth, tie a knot, back and forth, tie a knot. Just steady, repetitive but careful work. But every tiny knot was important to keep things from coming unraveled. 

    My days feel like that, aiming at one little situation after another, keeping things from unraveling by tying off knot after knot, generally so engrossed in the process I lose sight of the big picture. 

    Lord, help me give your care to each situation and person in my days while keeping You on the throne. Help me keep my eyes on You as tasks and even ugliness clamor for attention. May Your flow be so fresh and strong that I’m renewed in the midst of clamor. Help me to focus on the beauty of the fact that You are with meeven in the muck

    “Thy Kingdom come, Thy will be done on earth (in me) as it is in Heaven.”


    Chana is wife of one, mom to four and bestselling author of two. She brakes for old barns, chai, homemade cookies and any time someone needs to watch Pride & Prejudice.

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    Reader Comments (1)

    Chana, you are moving mountains! Albeit, one spoonful at a time but they ARE getting moved! Hang in there and keep fighting - your books are so worth it. :)

    August 19, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMark

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